Today is Bear’s very 1st birthday! And what a year it’s been since this amazing little boy added such a new and fitting dynamic to our family. It’s a bittersweet moment for us, my husband and myself, as Bear will be the last biological child we will ever have. (I add the qualifier “biological” on purpose.)
Since the moment I found out that I would have to have a vertical incision–because of a possible accreta–during my C-Section with our sweet boy, I knew there would be no more children after this. He would be our last. And I swore to myself then that I would cling to every moment I possibly could, try and engrave every milestone into my memory. I swore to myself that no matter how exhausted I was, no matter how frustrated, no matter what I was going through, I’d cherish every moment.
It sounds cliche, I know. And maybe it even sounds a little unfair to my older children (I felt that way for a long time), but there’s nothing to put into stark relief just how beautiful watching your child grow up really is until you realize that this will be the last time. Bear is the last baby I will ever carry in my body. He is the last mine. And that’s where the shock settles deep.
And so I have tried to make the most of it. I’ve tried to make the most of it for all of our children, including my niece, though we’ve only had her a short time. I try to sing more, laugh more, cuddle more, read more. I have done my best to be more present.
Bear’s favorite lullaby is “You Are My Sunshine”. The kid loves music, and even in the middle of a fit, he will stand up and start dancing if music begins to play. His favorite genres are pop and EDM, though he is also a big fan of the theme song I created for him.
He was rolling at 4 months, crawling at 6, and walking at 8. We chalk this up to the fact that he has three siblings and a cousin to keep up with. He’s not afraid to tussle with the other kids, either.
He has lungs for days and is not afraid to belt out his frustration, happiness, excitement, or anger.
He loves fruit but hates bananas and anything to do with them. If you try to give him one, or anything flavored like one, he will give you this look: (see right)
Just like any parents, we try and imagine what he’ll be when he grows up, and so far the options are:
The biggest compliment that we get about him are how “beautiful” his eyes are. He’s the gray-eyed oddball in a family of all hazel-eyed individuals..
His favorite activities include running for the road every time we go outside, treasure-hunting beneath the couch, hunting for crumbs under the dining table, hugging the cat–to death, and displaying his dominance over us with head-butts.
Bear truly is my little sunshine. He truly is my happiness in the gray skies, and one of five reasons why I get up every morning, and try harder each day to be a better mom.
Happy birthday, baby boy! ❤